An Attitude of Gratitude

All of my normal Thanksgiving preparations are done. It was easy to go through the motions and finish everything, but it all feels so, so wrong.

This is a hard Thanksgiving, not only because we lost Steve, but we also lost my dad (my last parent) just 3 months earlier. This is my first holiday without, not only ANY of my parents, but also my husband. I’m so thankful that I still have my brother and sister-in-law close by, but it still just feels off.

Here’s the deal though. I can sit here and feel sorry for myself, or I can CHOOSE to have an attitude of gratitude. I know that sounds cliche’ish, but there’s truth to this. Thankfulness is a choice. Everyone has crap they’re dealing with, mine just might look different than yours. None of it is fun and a lot of it is heart wrenching and lonely, but there is always something to be thankful for. Always.

I am thankful that I got to have Steve in my life for 22 years.
I am thankful for our beautiful children.
I am thankful that I have my brother close by.
I am thankful for Steve’s family.
I am thankful that I have a roof over my head.
I am thankful that I have cars to drive.
I am thankful that I have gas in my tank.
I am thankful I have food in my belly.
I am thankful that I have clean water to drink.
I am thankful that I am healthy.
I am thankful that I can worship my Jesus whenever and wherever I want.

Yes, we are going through a really hard time right now, but just look at that list! I haven’t even scratched the surface of all the things I have to be thankful for. An amazing church family, friends, extended family...those are just a few more!

Tomorrow, if the loneliness, anger, bitterness and pity try to settle in your heart, just take a second to SPEAK OUT LOUD what you are thankful for. Take the time to remind yourself that, even in hard times, you are truly blessed.

Here we go...

Hi, I'm Rachel.

I've never been a blogger, but I wear my heart on my sleeve. I have a tendency to share my heart openly and honestly and sometimes that makes people uncomfortable. I thought this would be a good venue to share my journey without overwhelming everyone on the Facebook.

So, what is my journey? I am a mother to 3 amazing kids. Well, they're kids to me, but honestly one is an adult and the other two are quickly approaching adulthood. Navigating the transition between teenager to adult has been a journey in itself, but unfortunately, I am also a recent widow to the love of my life. We had just celebrated our 20th anniversary 10 days prior when I lost him to a sudden, massive heart attack. Right now I am trying to navigate life without him. I am trying to find my "new normal."

So, this is my truth. This is my journey.

Let's just start with the obvious. Jesus & Lexapro. You may be thinking this is such an odd name for a blog. You may be thinking that it's a little sacrilegious, or you may be thinking "I get it. I see where she's coming from."

So why Jesus  and why Lexapro?

First and foremost, Jesus. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. There is SO MUCH POWER in His name. He is the love of my  life, my savior and my everything. Without Jesus, I would have never realized the freedom I have available to me through His sacrifice. I would still be set in the sin I was in and would be living a destructive life.

Secondly, Lexapro. Because I am human and sometimes a girl (or boy) just needs a little help. And if we're being totally honest, the title of this blog should probably be Jesus, Lexapro and Sometimes Valium.

I am going to start by copying posts from Facebook. This blog isn't just to share my journey, but I also want a record of it for myself.

God has been so faithful to me. I have seen His provision over and over again. It is nice to look back to be reminded of his goodness.